Ambacht Geluid & Co. ---------------- A Jetset Production ---------------- All Code by : Red Dwarf Screen Lay-out : Red Dwarf Modules : Brain of XTC and Neverland Jayce Contact Jetset ญญญญญญญญญญญญญญ JETSET Spaarne 32 1703 MT Heerhugowaard The Netherlands ---------------- Wij doen het zonder, want wij zijn stoer. Soon from a swapper near you Serial Killer, Overload II and a music disk from Jayce under the SCOOPEX label. What's this? 12 minutes of scrolltext 4 free! Nothing moves... Nothing happens... (De zaak dreigt te ESCALEREN!) JETSET presents the first (and probably last) release under the label AMBACHT GELUID & CO. This is not supposed to be a demo, an intro, or really anything. It's something err.. new. I, Jayce, call this a "TOO-LARGE-TO-GO-WITH-ANY-POTENTIAL-CODE-&-GFX-TRACKFLOATINGMO". The TWO soundtracks used are 473Kb and 343Kb, and let's assume not yet everbody has 1Mb chipmem (Ik zeg jou dag!), so there isn't enough CHIP left to let I Killr masturbate on his keys (laat Gerben het maar doen). The ad above is indeed serious... Not that these soundtracks specifically represent the meaning of AMBACHT GELUID & CO., but if there is some commercial company out there who's interested, I would be a fool not to show my address... YOU CAN CHANGE THE MUSIC BY PRESSING THE LEFT & RIGHT MOUSEBUTTON! (2nd module > 1 Mb chip only!) Just to warn you; this scrolltext features uncontrolled speech from JAYCE, I KILLR, WOLFMAN, SEc4, RED DWARF & TIMELESS. If you don't know these objects at all, reset and wait for SERIAL KILLER, OVERLOAD 2 and the (grote boze) WOLFMAN INTRO... Meanwhile in the dark basement of the BEDPRET INSTITUTE another release is being prepared. I don't know when it will be released, but 'I'm' working on a music-disk under SCOOPEX (Shit, Ambacht gaat vreemd! (I Killr)) and it will contain approx. 5 tracks... Time for the credits now: Coding and text-layout were done by RED DWARF / JETSET and the music is done by JAYCE / JETSET (= me!) Some personal greetingz must flow to: SCOOPEX (Vortex, Falcon, Ranger) * DEWIRE (Sacha, I probably will accept) * WOLFMAN (Great to have you in) * ANARCHY (Facet, you're just one of a kind!) * SANITY (Jester) If someone out there wants to contact me for anything then please write to JAYCE / JETSET SPAARNE 32 1703 MT HEERHUGOWAARD THE NETHERLANDS Okiedokie, it's time for a party review... On August 1st 1992 there was the MIRAGE PRIME '92 party... They promised: A traintaxi to the partyplace, clean lavatories, a fair competition and more. Well, you can guess what comes next! Yes, there were traintaxis, but unfortunatly there destination-zone didn't include the partyplace... Indeed, there were lavatories (in one piece!), shamely somebody had emptied his stomage over it, around 3 o'clock... Primary life support was hard to find around the party-place without 4 wheels under your ass, so you were left over to the local beer (ever heard of GROLSCH?) One positive thing (Yes I'm kidding!), you got a free trip to the amazone; I don't know if Mirage runs best at 40 degrees centigrade, but I don't (never heard of windows? They really were present!) And now for the competition. During the first 3 demos there was no sound support, at least not for mammals without the proper version SAE-OREN v1.3 Ltd. Actually during the whole competition they tried (OH YES THEY TRIED!?!) to get the sound under control... And of course PRIME wouldn't be PRIME (don't get your hopes up) if it wasn't.. err.. forget it... I KILLR GAAT NU NEE ZEGGEN! BOK TO THIS UNCIVILIZED REJECT 'KREKKERJAS' WHO MANAGED TO 'LOSE' MY ENTRY. (YOU'D LOSE YOUR DICK TOO, IF YOU HAD ONE). I GUESS I WASN'T OVERREACTING AT ALL! HMM... I SURE WAS WRONG ABOUT YOU ALL ALONG... YOU AIN'T WORTHY. GA MAAR NIET MEER MET I KILLR PRATERIGEREN, WANT I KILLR GAAT JOU HEEL HARD 'GRRR' ZEGGEN, WRAAKKUT! JAYCE -> BOMBZ AWAY! THIS IS THE SECOND TIME YOU LAME AWAY, 3x IS SCHEEPSRECHT! (NEXT TIME IT WON'T BE A LOUSY PHONECALL!) * PLEASE DON'T CALL ME, I WON'T CALL YOU! * SEC4 -> BOMBZ AWAY! YO COAT, ARDIE (KR_aak_'34) ASKED YOU TO KEEP axis ALIVE, SO WHY DID YA OFFICIALLY PRONOUNCE THAT axis DIED? NOW ALL HIS PLANS ARE PAST! YOU USED TO BE MY HOMIE AND NOW YOU ACT LIKE YOU DON'T KNOW ME... (JA MENSHEID, WIJ ZIJN BOOS OP CJ!) bAcK tO jAyCe >>> Meanwhile at the party in Riel there still was no movement on the part of the ventilators, and (de grote boze) WOLFMAN was starting to show the primary signs of dehydration and insomnia (HIGH-5!). Hoera, laten wij lol heb + ook blij zijn (ja!) Jayce will try to pass the keyboard through to SEc4 interactively! Gotcha! The keyboard. Bad luck, SEc4. You missed it by a couple of days. Instead of SEc4 it is Red Dwarf on the keys. Well, this production has caused me some problems, but that's what coding is all about. When your program keeps bugging it is a whole lot less fun being a coder, but when (NOT IF) you solve the problem the reward is much greater. The only thing that gives you a greater reward is a proper orgasm. Natuurlijk zonder, want wij zijn stoer (ik dus ook). Let me try to give you an accurate translation of our "Wij doen het zonder"-slogan: "BRRRUUUUAAAAAAAAAAHH + 1 = 5" Well, this must have broadend your mind quite a bit. Now I will pass the keyboard interactively after my contribution of text writing and maybe, maybe, SEc4 will have slightly more luck this time. Pindakaas in een vaas met kaas zegt Klaas. Anaal, nachtegaal in het Kanaal (Ja, goedzo SEc-ventje! Leef je maar uit nu het nog kan, want straks word je keihard ingewijd door Timeless! (zegt I Killr)) Ziekelijke text met een flufje (?) ka(M)neel. IJS-koud geserveerd door snollen en heren. Da main spray artist of the PRETSLET-BLIJ TEKENEN-SECTION. SEc4 personal greetings: Fairfax / P.M.C. (Yo homie, long time no see, will write ya soon! 1st some graphics to finish!) * Tomcat / Complex (Keep up your nice style of drawing...) * Flash / Frantic (How are you doing? Received my last package?) * THD / DeWire (Are you going to continue your game-work with @#$%&*!$?) * Facet / Anarchy (Send me some stuff from EngeCountry...) * RHAH / Devils (I've heard that you also do some graffiti, how about some trading?) * B(l)i(e)p / DeWire (Send me YOUR address, and not mine like last time! Geintje!) * Red Devil / Dual Crew (Why did ya leave Wizzcat? And why didn't you respond to my letters?) * Head / Alcatraz (No comment.. ya'r cool!) * SubZero (Gfx artist; I lost ya ardie, eh.. addy !) * Slash / Vision * Gadget / Cytax * Chrome / Silents Germany * Scoopex * Razor 1911 * Blo, Retep, Zully (Hully, Zijn...), Francis, Tomcat, MF / Mieraasjh * All the immortal creatures in the mean group called FrEeStYlE. Ya all are true players. Grrrreets to Magician Lord, Liberator, Claxon, And Anabole->Steroid<-(e) * Procyon & Dalmak / Stellar (Was my logo satisfying? Nice package by the way) * Ardie (KR'33333333333) / Sanity (Hohojooo boyyyyeee!! SEc4 is now a member of JETSET! Old news, I guess. Nice chat we had on Prime '92. Hope 2 get your Silents / Global Trash II video soon. Onze JETSET-copieerneven wachten op werk. (Onbetaalde arbeid met speciale clausules samengestelde arbeidsovereenkomst indien verstande betrekking hebbend op enige personen al dan niet ingeschreven bij de burgerlijke stand?!?) Jij snapt dit toch wel met jou ACU (I.q) regel even met Cougar dat hij wat op stuurt, OK? We zijn tenslotte niet voor niets zulke intieme vrienden. Ik heb laatst vernomen dat er weer een SM-avond georganiseerd wordt in onze PRIVE club. Heb je toevallig zin om mee te gaan? JETSET doet het zonder, want wij zijn STOER!! Mario (Timeloos) wordt gebokt door een geit... Ook introducees zijn welkom, zolang ze meebetalen aan de JETSET-jaaromzet. Bok zonder de klok, drink je melk op, want anders krijg je geen drop!! Speciaal voor de Eigenzinnige Stoere Wereld Amateur Tekenaar (ESWAT-SHADE..) Ik kom, ik kom, ik kom naar EINDHOVEN toe deze zomer, en ik neem lekkere snoepjes mee. Dan kunnen we gezellig samen wat gaan tekenen. Ik zal ondertussen een nieuw zwart-boek kopen zodat je die ook helemaal voor me vol kunt TAGGEN. Ondertussen kun jij even wat kopieen maken. (don't 4get!) Ik stuur jou ook wat leuks op. Nu is het bijna tijd om te stoppen, dus ik maak nog snel even gebruik van de kostbare tijd: Jayce is de beste en ik kan goed kletse. MAAAAZZZZZOOOOOOLLLLLL... SEc4 of JETSET 4 >> GRAFFITI-TRADING << ALSO on PAPER !!!! Write 2: SEc4 / JETSET LIJSTERLAAN 18 5104 PE DONGEN HOLLAND No phonenumber coz of privacy... And at last a word from the ugly and bad Wolfman from JETSET (former Royal Amiga Force-member). Ex-eX-ex-EX, because I have left RAF and joined J E T S E T (because it rules all money and planes - fuck KLM and Transavia) First I have to thank all JETSET members 4 letting me join the JETSET-plane. Greetings fly in no order to all my contacts. Personal greetings to MR.B England (send your address again: I've lost it) * Kurt Brazil (Thanks for the T-shirt) * All R A F - members (Do something in the future) * Special message to Jetaza: 'Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Geef acht!' If you want to contact me, write to the 'JETSET SPROOKJESBOS PO BOX' in Holland, which address is: PO BOX 376 1600 AJ ENKHUIZEN THE NETHERLANDS EUROPE EARTH SOLAR SYSTEM MILKY WAY MARS RAIDER This noty was very short, but I'm not so tall (maar ik wip wel lekker) and remember: 'Wij doen het zonder, want wij zijn stoer!' I'm going to end this bullshit and (ga)go (jou)you (dag)bye (zeggen)say! Gratis + 4 free! Sld. Timeless 'SAE-Oren' gaat meer hallo zeg als iemand anders dan ik. For those who didn't understand... that's a shame. If you have to much ink laying around in combination with paper then send it in a (dis)orderly fashion to: TIMELESS / JETSET TESTGROUND AMER 17 1703 LB HEERHUGOWAARD THE NETHERLANDS Only articles weighing over 500 grams will be accepted. Now over to the more important things in life, the 'Ik-Zeg-Hallo-Tegen-Iemand-Anders-List': Rob (Samples heb heb heb heb heb, RegelNeef en HuisNatie-Meneer) * Thomas (Idem heb heb heb 2de HuisMeneer) * Maddy (Dirk, ik zeg jou hallo. Ik smacht naar een 36 delige brief over de praktijken van de 'Mensen-Die-Een-Antipathie-Hebben-Voor-Nederlanders-En-Waloonen' en meer) * Gay Bevroren (Nee, ik hoef geen banaan) * De grote boze WolfMeneer (Welcome homes. We finally got a bi-sexual member) * Facet (Catch a plane and come over. Then we can run away from ugly people with sticks again (pAaLmAn!) Oh yeah, did you know that people in EngeCountry drive on the right?) * Jetaza (In de houding staat. Brengt groet aan Jetset) After this little interlude I have this to say: 'Dag ik zeg aan jou! ('Mag ik nu even vliegen!') I KILLR >>> Ik ga de mensen dag praten: 'DAG!' So you're sexually frustrated, a potential serial killer, a frigid mega-paalman-klan-member, someone who keeps dead chickens in his fridge, something that likes MoLeeNex' exclusive bamo including pieces of Timeless' cap, or worse... Here's your chance: It's back! I Killr is searching for beings in rehabilitation, who've just found out that they're actually female instead of male. Contact me if you're forced by your mother to read my exclusive letters (or at least pretend to) and are able to fill more than ONE full page with structured ink molecules... Use the same address if you think there's a seat free for you and your art, code, board, list etc. in the notorious JETSET-pretplane. (Ja! Lekker blij vliegeren in de pretjet des levens! Hoi!) I KILLR / JETSET HQ SPAARNE 32 1703 MT HEERHUGOWAARD THE NETHERLANDS (use your Actie Respeel I, II or III to read this address again) I Killr leeft! Aanbid hem! +31(0)2207-18831 (weekends only) I Killr is going to try to give his personal 'I say hello'-s to: Gonzo / Unreal Design (Uh.. I'm empty; I wrote everything in my letter. You'll have it soon!) * Fade One / Complex (Err.. I.. eh.. I didn't dare opening your last letter for 11 months, 'cause ehm.. Timeless told me there was an evil monster in it. I had him listen to "Achtunddreizig-Hits-im-Techno-Megamix" for 3 hours as punishment!) * Chester / Brainstorm (Also *sOrRy* to you for not answering your note! I'll send you some original dutch insects for comfort!) * Jnycomltly (How's life, wife, kid, pet, job, computer, board, synth, Tennessee?) * Mad Shitbrain / Fusion (Jij weet het nog niet, maar wij gaan weer traderen!) * Facet / Anarchy (Raapt die vent die paal op, zegt 'ie: 'Hee yo bro, niet door me tuin walken else ik jou doden.' Zeg ik zo, heel koel: 'Maar wij zijn van Jetset aan het zijn, lul!' Gaat hij zegt: 'Ik ook wel!' Ik zo: 'Bok you, knuppelhout!' Hij: 'PAALPAALSTOKPAAL' Ik: 'Auw. Sorry mega-paalman! I Luvvr you. Zullen we gratis palen?') * Kickface / 666 (A3000 turbo intercooler coming soon! Drooldrool!) * MF + Retep + Tomcat / Mirage (Ik ook wel.) * Falcon + Vortex / Scoopex (Rougherdamn = niet hoi! Wir gehen megawreed huizen in MultiGroove!) * Gay Bevroren / Dewire (Nee, ik hoef ook geen banaan.) TIME 4 THE OFFICIAL JETSET-HELLO-LIST: >> GREETINGS TO ALL EXCEPT YOU << If you're still reading you must be stoer enough to join J E T S E T. Actually we're still interested in CODERS, GFX ARTISTS and BELOVED BOARDS. CURRENT JETSET BODYCOUNT >> 7 << : I KILLR (LEADER, CODER, GFX, MAIL) * JAYCE (MUSICIAN) * SEC4 (GRAPHICS) * RED DWARF (CODER) * WOLFMAN (MAIL, ORGANIZER) * TIMELESS (OFFICIAL JETSET-NEW-MEMBER- INITIATOR TYPE AUW! (10 INCHES), MUSICIAN) * WEIRDO (MUSICIAN) *** J E T S E T - W I J D O E N H E T Z O N D E R , W A N T W I J Z I J N S T O E R ! *** I Killr: 'Wie gaat Wolfman eigenlijk inwijden?' Timeless: 'Err.. Ik misschien, suggestie, hint hint? I Killr: 'Ik denk eerder dat 'ie JOU inwijd in z'n SM-kelder op zolder, met je pet er gratis bij!' Timeless: 'Auw.' >>>